How to Review TRANSFORMERS: Revenge of the Fallen

Ever since Michael Bay stepped into the filming industry, the whole idea of a movie is divided in two.




There’s the usual movie-type movie where there are in depth plot, character development, solid lines and sophisticated twist and even some exploration of the humanity, such as 2001: A Space Odyssey, Jaws, The Godfather, Pulp Fiction... heck, even Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back or better yet some of the newer movies like The Dark Knight and even The Hangover.

And then there’s the Michael Bay-type movie where there are massive plotholes that are so big that you might fell off your sit, huge explosions, slow-motion sequences, and people running around acting scared and hysteric. Oh yeah, add in a dash of dirty humour and a bit of racism, why not.

Now let me tell you a story.

I have a dream. I have a dream that Transformers will be a legendary cartoon show that will amazed the generations to come. I have a dream of the younger generations watching it and be awed by the storyline and the characters themselves. I have a dream. But then someone came up with the idea of a live-action Transformers movie. Still, my dream remains. I have a dream that one day if that movie was to be made, it will be made by some genius directors that can do the franchise justice. Yes, I have a dream. And then it was announced that Steven Spielberg has something to do with it. My dream almost came true. I felt that my life was somewhat complete. But no, he wasn’t directing it. That job was given to Michael Bay. I did not put my hopes high.

Then the first movie came out. The effects were brilliant. I didn’t love the storyline or the characters etc, but there were enough action and suspense to keep me watching. I told myself, “Heck, that wasn’t as a bad as I imagined it’d be.”






Two years later, Revenge of The Fallen came out. I gave it a chance and went to see it. Thus, I lost all hopes for the Transformers movie franchise and for Michael Bay himself...

I asked myself, "How the heck am I supposed to write a review for this?"

But still, my dream remains. I have to do justice for the franchise. So I will now write a non-biased review.

If you see it as a movie-type movie, of course, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is an epic fail. There were no character development. The storyline – I won’t even call it rushed – was a mess! So much plotholes that you can shove Optimus Prime in them and back again. There was too many missed opportunity for a better plot such as the “Sam-as-a-fugitive” storyline which could’ve been more in depth or even “Jetfire, the old Decepticon turned good” deserves a better back story than that. And a lot of WTF moments. And one more thing, I remember the filmmaker saying that they had to write in Shia LaBeouf hand injury -- that was also one of the WTF moments.


But the only way to write a good review for this movie is that you have to see it as a Michael Bay-type movie. Then this is the best movie ever made. His best effort yet. There were plenty of explosions that your ears could go numb, slow-motion sequences that most probably made up half an hour of the movie, and some more explosions! There are also random Transformers running around that you won’t even know who is fighting what. I don't think anyone is capable of making a better Michael Bay-type movie than this. Heck, I don't even think Bay himself can top this.


And now, an exclusive quote from Megan Fox :

"I mean, I can't s--- on this movie because it did give me a career and open all these doors for me. But I don't want to blow smoke up people's a--. People are well aware that this is not a movie about acting."

(taken from an interview in the Us Magazine, full article on Yahoo! can be found here: http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/us-magazine-megan-fox-bay.html )

Yeah, Megan, that's the reason why Mr. Bay hired you in the first place. Now how about telling us something we don’t know.